Talking About What Hurts

Believe me when I say I know what pain is. Believe me again when I tell you I know what it's like to not want to talk about what hurts. There are over a thousand and five reasons why we do not talk about what hurts inside( I hope you know I just exaggerated). Have I told you to believe me when I tell you I didn't believe the saying: "a problem shared is a problem solved"? Yes, I had the opinion that your problem is still your problem even after you share it. Yes, you read right: I used had, which means I don't think so anymore.

Allow me tell you that there are a thousand and five reasons (I'm still exaggerating) why we refuse to talk about what hurts. 

Reasons why we do not talk about what hurts

1. We think it's pointless: if you think talking about what hurts is pointless and a waste of time and saliva, then you're thinking the way I used to think. Read the word 'used' again, denotes past tense. It isn't pointless to talk about what hurts. Keep reading.
2. We do not know how to start: okay, sometimes, we actually want to talk about what hurts, but we do not even know where to start from. We are unable to gather words that describe the pain and/or emptiness we feel inside.
3. Lack of trust for those around us: sadly, sometimes we just do not have around us people who we trust, so we keep all the pain inside and hope we become fine.
4. Fear: Amongst other reasons, fear largely contributes to why we do not talk about what hurts. Again, there are a thousand and five (still exaggerating) fears that prevent us from talking about what hurts. A few of them include:

• Fear of being judged.
• Fear of facing the truth.
• Fear of becoming the gossip topic.
• Fear that the person we're talking to would not understand how we feel.

Imagine being judged for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Yeah, that's a reason why people do not talk about what hurts. Sometimes, we avoid the truth, and we are well aware that if we talk about some of our feelings, the truth will come right in front of us. We do not want to be the one almost everyone is talking about so we bottle up our feelings. And other times, we just do not think that anyone would understand.

Why talk about what hurts?

You must have asked yourself, "why talk about what hurts?" Talking about what hurts is important because it's a way of letting out the pain that eats you up inside. And yes, you might not believe this, but it's a way to heal and move on. Talking about what hurts, is important.

How to talk about what hurts

Again, there are a thousand and five ways to talk about what hurts( I'm sure you've figured I'm exaggerating again). It is with excitement that I'm telling you that you do not have to talk to someone to talk about what hurts. How? 

One of the best and easiest way to talk about what hurts, is to talk to someone. This person could be a friend, family member or a therapist, the choice is yours. What matters is that you're talking. So you're bothered about something, and there's a person you trust or feel comfortable with, tell them about it. They don't always have to be in the best position to proffer a solution, but believe me, talking to them will make you feel better.

Another way to talk about what hurts is to trust your mirror. Make the mirror one of your best friends and tell the image you see how you feel. Don't hold anything back, just talk to your reflection about the tiniest and silliest thing, and you'll see how fine you'll feel after.

Another secret to letting the pain out is to talk to an imaginary friend. I do this a lot. When it gets really hard, I just create an image of someone I like and have a conversation with them in my head. I've cried from talking to someone in my head. It was a means to let out the pain. There was no place to hide as I said everything as it was. This felt good as I understood my feelings better.

Another way to talk about what hurts, is to talk to God. Believe me, this is one of the most comforting ways. You ask how to do this. Just tell God how it is. I've been so tired I said: "God, I'm really tired, I don't even know what to ask. Just rectify my affairs and please sort things out." And God always listens. 

You have questions? Drop them in the comment section. 

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